What’s the Point in Winning If You Lose Yourself in the Process? (Summer Shift Week 8)

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SPEAKER_01: I want to start off today with a simple question.

If you win the race but lose yourself in the process, what did you actually accomplish?

Another way to say it, if you achieve your goal but wreck relationships in the process, you had to hurt people, do some things that weren't good, what really does it mean at the end of the day?

Today we're talking about the very real understanding that how you run the race matters than where you finish.

I don't care if you come in first place, last place, that doesn't matter.

But how did you run the race?

That's what matters.

And that, my friend, is what makes up today's 455th episode of Great Grace and Inspiration.

My friend, what is up?

I am your host, Kevin Lowe, bringing you today another episode in our Summer Shift series.

This is week number eight.

The week in which we talk about the journey, not the destination.

And most importantly, is how we embark upon that journey, how we run the race, not how we finish it.

Now, in case you are new here, maybe you're just hopping on board the SummerShift series.

Maybe you're a first timer to the podcast in general.

Well, my friend, I am your host and the creator of this podcast, Kevin Allo.

I am also an inspirational public speaker, and also the creative talent behind Kalo Music, my own custom music production service.

So maybe you came for a podcast, and maybe you're thinking, though, wow, I can use an inspirational speaker for my company or my association's next meeting.

Or maybe you're thinking to yourself, What is a custom music production agency?

What is Kevin talking about?

Well, my friend, you can learn more about all of the above by checking out today's show notes linked in this episode, or all the ways in which we can connect.

You can check out the website.

You can find me on all the places inside of the show notes.

So make life easy and check those out.

But that is that.

Let's talk about today, what we're talking about.

This idea of how you run the race is more important than where you finish.

Now, since this is the summer shift series, we might as well go back to the beach.

And today we're talking about sandcastles.

So I want you to picture you're in the midst of a competition.

Who could build the best sandcastle?

Or, okay, maybe you're not somebody who's into building sandcastles.

Maybe it's easier for you to picture some kids down at the beach and they're participating in a sandcastle contest.

Either way, you want to look at it, just a vision.

We're at the beach, we're building sandcastles, and we're competing against one another.

Now, you got two different kids, two different people.

One kid, he's a jerk.

He's building his sandcastle, but while he's doing it, he's trying to sabotage the other kids.

He's stealing the shovels, he's getting the best buckets.

And when nobody's looking, he's knocking over their castle.

He's a jerk.

Now, at the end of the competition, well, he's the only one with the sandcastle that's still standing, that still looks like anything.

So he wins.

Woo-hoo, good for him.

The jerk won the sandcastle contest.

What does that really do for him when he's alone?

When he's back at his house that night?

Did he really win anything?

No.

He just cheated his way through life, through a competition.

Now, on the other hand, what if we look at another competitor, another person building a sandcastle?

And that person, yeah, they built their sandcastle, but they helped out the competition.

When somebody was struggling, they gave them a hand.

They took the time to give them a shovel because they saw that they didn't have one.

They helped the person next to them.

And most of all, they actually just enjoyed the entire thing.

Yeah, they were being competitive.

They were trying their best, building the castle.

And at the end, did they win?

Maybe they did, maybe they didn't.

Maybe they came in third place.

But my gosh, they enjoyed the day.

They had a blast.

They had fun.

They made friends along the way.

They ran the race like we should all run the race.

They did it.

And along the way, they became a better version of themselves.

They got more out of it.

They won the journey, not just the race.

And so at the end of the day, when we think about the sandcastle, we all know what happens.

By tomorrow, there are no sandcastles.

The tide comes in and washes it all away.

And so again, you're left to think what kid really won?

Who really won?

Was it the kid who was a jerk, who cheated, or was it the kid who showed up as their best, who gave it their all, but also was there to help others along the way?

Obviously, it's the person who cared about how they played the game, how they showed up.

That's the person who truly won.

Not just the contest, but won in life.

Now, that was a fun example.

It was a day at the beach.

But the fact is true is that this hits close to home in our everyday life.

Because we live in a world obsessed with outcomes.

It's all about winning the deal, getting the promotion.

And somewhere along the way, we've learned that winning is the only thing that truly matters.

Now, what does that do?

This idea that winning is the only thing that matters.

Well, on paper, it looks amazing.

The numbers are great.

Everything is in alignment.

Everything looks fantastic.

But you know what it also means?

Is that we have a society of people living a life that are unfulfilled.

That they're going home at the end of the day, empty.

Yeah.

Like I said, on paper, it looks great.

The bank account, it is amazing.

But them, their soul, who they are, they're empty inside.

And so if you're achieving success, but it's costing you your character, my friend, that is no success that any of us should want to achieve.

So the question becomes how do you focus on still winning the race, but running the race in a way that you want to?

The way that's gonna have you winning, but also feeling fulfilled.

Well, my friend, of course, I've got a few ideas for you.

First and foremost, you have to win with integrity.

What does it look like to run a race with integrity?

Well, it means that you're not cheating, you're not cutting corners.

You understand that shortcuts, yeah, they might get you to the finish line faster, but they rob you of your own self-respect.

They rob you of the ability to go home at night and say to yourself, Wow, I really did it.

No.

Instead, you lie awake at night realizing that everybody else thinks you're somebody you're not, because you're a cheater.

You just cut corners.

You found a shortcut and you cheated.

And that's the only reason you won.

And my friend, you wake up the next morning and that feeling's even heavier, weighing heavy on your mind.

Instead, I want you to run the race.

I want you to show up with integrity.

Not for anybody else, but for you.

Second, you win by lifting others.

You be the kid on the beach in the sandcastle contest who is helping their competitors.

You understand that winning is only awesome when you can do it with others.

When you help other people succeed, my friend, you will succeed.

A rising tide lifts all boats.

And so I encourage you that, yes, in competition, we have competitors, but it doesn't mean that you have to trip them while you're racing.

It doesn't mean that you have to knock over their sand castle.

No, you play fair, you play by the rules, you can be fierce, you can be competitive, but you don't have to be a jerk.

You don't have to cheat your way, steal your way through life.

No, lift people up, help others succeed.

And my friend, I'm telling you, you will succeed as well.

Next, you win by becoming somebody better.

Yeah.

The short-term goal is winning the race.

The long-term goal is becoming somebody different by the time you reach the finish line.

It's building character, it's building you all by becoming somebody better.

Because you're somebody who ran the race and showed up like you know you want to, where you're building fulfillment.

You're not just competing in a competition.

So at the end of the day, at the end of the journey, the race, the competition, who did you become?

What did you learn?

Because if it turned you into somebody that you're proud of, well, then my friend, again, it doesn't matter what position you ended in, you've already won.

All of these things said, I want you to think of the people who you admire the most, the athletes, the superstars.

Who are the ones that you really and truly look up to?

It's probably not the person who's always been on top.

Maybe instead, it's the person who you've just really admired watching how they are on the field.

They're lending a hand, picking their competitors up.

They're over on the sidelines, giving high fives, cheering on people.

They're the guy who is there making a difference, showing up.

Those, quite honestly, are probably the people who you really and truly admire.

Or maybe you're a parent and you look at your kids and you think to yourself, My gosh, I don't want them thinking of that person on TV as their hero because look at what that person's actually like in real life, or how they're actually playing the game.

It's dirty.

Even though they're winning, how did they win?

Think of who those people are.

And think of the reasons why you either don't really like them, or think of the reasons why you do really love that person.

My friend, that's what I want for you.

I want you to get to be the person who's not always on the top of the podium, but instead it's the person who showed up with integrity, the person who showed up ready to build themselves, to lift others, to live every day, to run every race, to compete in every competition, not just as this one instance, but instead as another building block of life.

My friend, it's not about how you finish the race, it's how you run the race.

Run the race in a way in which is gonna make you proud when at the end of the day, when you go to bed at night, and it's just you and your thoughts, that you can end the day feeling proud and honored that you showed up as the best version of you.

This was another episode of Grit Grace and Inspiration.

My friend, if you have not already started following the podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or any other preferred podcast app, please be sure that you hit the little follow button so that you can get notified each and every Tuesday morning when a new episode is released.

And to end, my friend, get out there, enjoy this beautiful time of year, the beautiful summertime, go build a sand castle.

But please, by all means, if you find yourself in the midst of a sand castle competition, please, oh please, be the kid who helps your competitors and don't be the jerk.

Until next time, I'm your host, Kevin Lowe, my friend.

Get out there and enjoy this beautiful day.