What if one moment, one discovery, could completely change the direction of your life? In this episode, we’re diving deep into a story of courage, resilience, and transformation all spurred by just one moment.

Many of us face unexpected challenges that test our strength and purpose. This episode relates to anyone seeking hope, inspiration, and a reminder of the inner strength we all possess.

What’s It All About?

Join us as we explore the remarkable journey of Thandi Montgomery. Her story is not just about surviving breast cancer but discovering her true self, the strength of faith, and the power of family. From finding a small lump to battling through treatments, Thandi shares her raw, unfiltered experiences and the profound lessons she learned along the way. This episode is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the transformative power of facing life’s toughest challenges head-on.

Some Key Takeaways:

  1. Embracing Resilience: Learn how Thandi navigated her cancer journey with courage and strategic planning, transforming adversity into strength.
  2. The Power of Support Systems: Discover the importance of leaning on family, friends, and support groups to get through challenging times.
  3. Finding Purpose: Understand how facing a life-threatening diagnosis helped Thandi find her true purpose and inspired her to help others shift from merely existing to truly living.

This is an interview you will not want to miss! Thandi’s empowering story paired with her magical personality will capture your attention and warm your heart from the first moment you meet her!

LINKS & RESOURCES

MENTIONED IN THE EPISODE

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CLICK HERE to Get on The OFFICIAL Email List for the Podcast!

TODAY’S AMAZING GUEST

THANDI MONTGOMERY

In 2021, Thandi was diagnosed with Stage 1B breast cancer, and won the battle after enduring 4 surgeries, 16 rounds of chemo, and 30 days of radiation. This battle gifted her with a profound sense of purpose and self-awareness.

Now, as a survivor and advocate with over 15 years of marketing experience, Thandi and her team are dedicated to supporting cancer patients, survivors, caregivers, and organizations through transformative courses and services focusing on mindset, habits, nutrition, and creative expressions.

Please visit Thandi’s website to learn more.

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Transcript

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What if one moment, one discovery could completely change the direction of your life?

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Today, we're diving deep into a story of courage, of resilience, of transformation.

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It's the story of my absolutely phenomenal guest today, Tondi Montgomery.

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Her journey, it's not just about survival. rival. It's about discovering her

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true self, the strength of faith, and the power of family.

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Tandi, she's going to share with you her real, raw, unfiltered story that goes

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through the course of a chapter in her life that started with a moment, just a second.

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It was just the size of a pea, and yet it all changed from that day forward.

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So if you were looking for a story to not only inspire you, but to also just

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remind you of the strength within us all, then this is an interview you will not want to miss.

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This, my friend, is episode 300.

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This is the story of Tondi Montgomery.

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Yo, are you ready to flip the script on life? Because those bad days,

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they're just doors to better days.

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And that's exactly what we do here at Grit, Grace, and Inspiration.

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Your host, Kevin Lowe, he's been flipping the script on his own life,

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turning over 20 years of being completely blind into straight up inspiration,

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motivation, and encouragement just for you.

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So, kick back, relax, and let me introduce you to your host, Kevin Lowe.

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What is up, my friend? Welcome back to the podcast, as always.

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Hey, we made it. It's our 300th episode.

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I am excited you're here, whether it's your first time or you've been here from the beginning.

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I am so thrilled and appreciative that you are here today.

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Now, I'm going to get to my interview with Tondi real quick,

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but I just wanted to be sure that I told you thank you.

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Thank you for being here. Thank you for being a part of this amazing journey.

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Podcasting has has brought so much joy to my life.

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It has brought so many new opportunities and I just cannot be more grateful.

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And so I just wanted to be sure that I said, thank you.

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I also want to remind you that right now we are in the midst of summer and I

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have my sizzling summer special where I am offering free one-on-one coaching all summer long.

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All you have to do is text summer 2024.

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That's all one word, no spaces, summer 2024 to the phone number 33-777.

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Again, that phone number is 33777, and I will give you a link to book your free

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one-on-one coaching call.

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30-minute deep dive where we can explore what you've got going on in life,

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where you're trying to get to, and figure out what roadblocks are standing in the way.

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You can find that information plus a direct link inside of today's show notes

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if that makes life any easier. year.

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With that out of the way, my friend, it's my pleasure to introduce you to today's

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absolutely incredible guest.

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Here is Tondi Montgomery.

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I refer to the Tondi before the diagnosis as Tondi 1.0.

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So I'll give you a little background about Tondi 1.0.

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And so I've been in advertising for almost 15 years now.

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So led a lot of really great work from Verizon to Capital One to AT&T, so many great clients.

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And so Tani 1.0 was and is still ambitious, just really excited about life and what it had to offer.

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I've had two little kids and I've also been married for 17 years.

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And so life before the diagnosis on paper, you would think that everything was

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copacetic, everything was great, But there was still something missing.

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And that was my purpose and my desire to do more than just, you know,

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live day to day and check the box. Yeah.

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I get it. I get it. How would you describe that feeling?

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Like to say to somebody that you felt like there was something missing?

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You know, when I woke up in the, you know, every day, I'm like,

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okay, I know what I'm supposed to do.

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I'm Tandi, the wife, Tandi, the mom, you know, Tandi, the ad executive.

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I knew that part, but in terms of who I was at the core, I was still trying to find who she was.

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So I always felt that something was different. and something was missing, something was lacking.

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It was as if I had a mask on every single day, kind of afraid to share and show

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the world who the real Tondi is.

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Yeah, I love it so much.

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So I know the big part of our story is, of course, your cancer diagnosis.

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Before we even get to that, though, did you ever have any family history?

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Anybody in your family with cancer?

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Well, not breast cancer. So my grandfather had prostate cancer,

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but breast cancer didn't run in my family.

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Okay. Okay. Wow. Interesting. Okay. So unless there's anything before it,

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let's go ahead and dive in.

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And I would love for you to kind of just walk us through the events from how this even got started.

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And I would love to hear that story. Yeah, absolutely.

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And so I am, I'm very in tune when it comes to my body and my health.

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I eat healthy. I work out five to six times a week.

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And so if you can imagine this diagnosis came as a surprise,

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but I'm always do my monthly checks. And so what does that mean?

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So as females, it's important to do your monthly breast exams.

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And so I found my own cancer, Kevin, I found my own cancer and I was like,

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something's not right here, but I don't think it's too much,

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but I don't want to overlook the lump. It was a small lump, the size of a pea.

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And so I went to the doctor immediately.

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They did a mammogram, an ultrasound.

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They told me to come back for a biopsy. And when they told me to come back,

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that's when something, I knew it wasn't right. I'm like, okay,

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something is not right here.

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And then after all the results came back, my PCP called me. It was November 1st, 2021.

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And my PCP, it was over the phone and she said, Tondi, you have invasive ductal carcinoma.

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And at that time, Kevin, I was like, is this a new strand of COVID?

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Like, I don't, you know, I had no idea what that was. I'm like,

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oh, that's interesting. You know, but I said, so what is that?

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And she looked, you know, she said, you have breast cancer. Right.

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Hmm. And my world literally stopped.

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Kevin, I had a meeting scheduled for five o'clock that day.

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My appointment was at four o'clock. I no longer thought about the presentation

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or my client work or anything else.

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The first thing that I thought about was what about my family?

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And I'm too young to die. I was 38 at the time.

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And so a lot of times they tell you don't get a mammogram until you're 40.

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Well, I'm so glad that I took the precaution and did my own exam and found my

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own cancer so that I could be proactive.

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And of course, start while it was early. So it was a stage one,

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which is the very beginning stages of breast cancer.

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Yes. Oh, my gosh. I mean, what though a testament to the fact of doing your

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own self-exam. Yes, absolutely.

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Yeah. Incredible.

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Wow. So you get this diagnosis now.

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Were you in the doctor's office or was this all over the phone?

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It was over the phone. So I was at home.

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Wow. Yeah, I was at home and I was literally taken aback.

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And, you know, like I said, so many thoughts flooded my head. What about the kids?

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I'm too young to die right now. There's still purpose left in me.

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There was so much that I thought about because when the reality of death is

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kind of in your face, you're like, oh, my God, like, what did I do wrong?

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You know, but again, I decided to talk to my family. They have been and continue to be very supportive.

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And I was like, Tondi, this is not what you expected.

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This is this sucks. It's not what you expected.

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I'm going to be honest with you, but you're going to fight through this and

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you're going to win. And so after the original diagnosis, we had planned to

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just have a double mastectomy.

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And that's when you have both of the girls removed.

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And I was supposed to get on my merry way and have reconstructive surgery and

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get back on to life as normal within two months.

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But after my initial surgery, when the results came back, Kevin,

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the cancer had spread to my lymph nodes.

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And so the two month journey ended up turning into 12 months.

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So within that 12 months, it was 16 rounds of chemo, 30 days of radiation and four surgeries.

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Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Briefly backing up about your family.

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You were a mother. How old were your kids? At that time, they were eight and four. Wow.

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Yeah. How young?

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Does Tondi, the mom, even do that?

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Yeah. I mean, continuing being a mom while going through this treatment.

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Yeah, absolutely. And that's a good question, Kevin, because life doesn't stop.

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You know, the kids still need things. You still have to show up to soccer games

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and the PTA meetings and all of those things.

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And what I ended up doing was, Kevin, and I want your audience to really hear

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this, Tani 1.0 would have had

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this superwoman cape on and tried to pretend as if everything was okay.

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And I was like, you know what? I can't get through this journey pretending as if I'm okay.

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And so I really allowed myself to tell the kids what was going on.

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So we educated them on what is cancer.

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We educated them on the process. So they knew what is chemo?

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What is radiation? how does this help mom feel better they

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also knew about like the unconventional side of

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that which is the supplements and working out and

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exercising just to make sure that those two

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were married and really which would help me to expedite the

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the recovery process and so we literally my husband

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and i sat down and we talked to them about the entire process and it was really

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good that they saw mom not just as a strong tondi 1.0 but they saw mom in her

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weakest moments which increased their faith and increase their responsibilities

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and their reliability on themselves. Yeah. Oh, wow.

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That's so powerful. Now, during this basically year journey,

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did you have to spend any extended time in the hospital?

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So with the surgeries, the only time I had to spend in the hospital was like two nights.

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And that's when I had the reconstructive surgery. With the chemo,

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it was every week for the first 12 and then every other week for the the last four.

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With radiation, I was there every day, Monday through Friday. So I was in and out.

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Yeah. Yeah. What kind of like side effects and stuff did you have to deal with?

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I mean, I think of, of course, like, you know, like losing your hair,

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but just kind of curious. Yes, absolutely.

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And so, Kevin, I'm a strategist by by profession and by nature.

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So I went in with a strategy when it was my faith.

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And then, of course, finding out and researching everything that I had to learn

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about breast cancer and everything that I needed to learn about chemo and radiation.

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So what are the side effects? What's the recovery time period?

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And so I went in there, I had a spreadsheet, Kevin, and I said,

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okay, side effects, possibility one can be losing your hair.

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Okay. What is the solution?

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Okay. Let me go ahead and get my wig first. Side effect option B could be,

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you know, low blood cell, low blood count.

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Let me go ahead and get some supplements. And so literally, I had a spreadsheet

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that light up all the possible side effects so that when and if it happened, I would be prepared.

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And so even down to like the gum sensitivity, and there's so many different

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things that you, the fatigue as well.

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So even when it comes to fatigue, I knew that there were going to be certain

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times throughout the week that I'll be very fatigued.

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And so I saw an integrative medical doctor and she basically gave me some holistic

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things that I could do to help fight against the fatigue, like drinking bone

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broth or having a lot of protein to really help my cells rebuild.

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Yeah. Wow, wow, wow.

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Were you able to work during this period or no?

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So I decided to take off. And so, like I said, I have been in advertising over 15 years.

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So I had a really great employee and employer, excuse me, and they were so supportive,

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Kevin, so supportive in terms of me being able to take off that time because

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I really wanted to focus on my health and to make sure that I was able to go

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to the doctor appointments,

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making sure that I had the time to research and recover without focusing on

00:13:28.125 --> 00:13:30.605

the deadlines. Yeah, absolutely.

00:13:31.685 --> 00:13:34.985

So here's when we're going to introduce the variable.

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Here you are. You're a woman. You're a mother. You're a wife.

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You now have cancer. You're fighting it.

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And then you have some crazy idea to start posting it on YouTube.

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You got to talk to me about this because you documented this entire process.

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It's funny that you mentioned that because, again, kind of referring back to

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Time D 1.0, even though I was in theater, I did a lot of things on stage,

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but I was still private when it came to my personal life.

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So I didn't really share a lot of the intimate moments in terms of what I was

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doing behind the scenes.

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But my brother, who was a videographer, he said, Tondi, I don't care what you're

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going through, whether it's a high moment or a low moment, I need you to record

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what's going on because you are going to help so many people.

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You may not see it right now, but I need you to record it. And I was like,

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I don't think I'm going to do that.

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No, that's not going to happen. But something prompted me and I knew that was

00:14:41.610 --> 00:14:46.010

a part of my mission was to not just share the highs,

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but also to show the lows, show me getting my hair shaved, show me going in

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and out of the doctor's office, show me crying and in my most vulnerable state.

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And to this day, I am so incredibly grateful that he gave me that wisdom because

00:15:00.970 --> 00:15:06.630

yes, to your point, I was able to use my experience in advertising and put my

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story across different channels. So you mentioned YouTube.

00:15:09.390 --> 00:15:14.550

So creating the documentary 16 Tuesdays. So that really focused on every Tuesday

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I was getting chemo for 16 rounds.

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And so I called it 16 Tuesdays. And I also was able to use my story and post

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it across Instagram and Facebook, create an affirmation book,

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just so many different things, do motivational speaking.

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There are so many things that I was able to do by the grace of God because of

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the journey that I went through.

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Wow. Wow. So what we're saying is Tondi 2.0 became pretty darn amazing.

00:15:44.790 --> 00:15:47.230

She's resilient. She's pretty resilient.

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Oh, my goodness. I love it so much. during that time,

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is there any moments that kind of stand out for one or two reasons,

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either memorable because of something good, even in all that bad,

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maybe it was a person or something happening.

00:16:05.770 --> 00:16:09.670

And then on the opposite spectrum, one of your lowest moments.

00:16:09.950 --> 00:16:14.890

Yeah, that's a really great question. I would say the high moments, Kevin, are,

00:16:15.227 --> 00:16:21.247

I jumped off the hamster wheel of life and I slowed down for the first time ever.

00:16:21.427 --> 00:16:26.407

And I began to really enjoy the moment with my family.

00:16:26.567 --> 00:16:31.207

I wasn't rushing trying to do this and do that, but I slowed down for the first

00:16:31.207 --> 00:16:34.667

time and I literally noticed the seasons change.

00:16:35.047 --> 00:16:38.207

I noticed the trees and I noticed the leaves coming back.

00:16:38.347 --> 00:16:43.367

I noticed the snowfall. I heard the birds chirping. So my sensitivity in terms

00:16:43.367 --> 00:16:49.947

of just being in the moment and really appreciating life and my family really heightened.

00:16:50.527 --> 00:16:53.907

Yes. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. That's so beautiful.

00:16:54.107 --> 00:16:58.347

For sure. And then I also, you know, I found my voice, Kevin.

00:16:58.507 --> 00:17:03.107

I learned how to advocate for myself because sometimes, you know,

00:17:03.127 --> 00:17:05.827

in the health care industry, they can be dismissive at times.

00:17:05.827 --> 00:17:12.027

So I learned how to one, be prepared, do my research, you know, have a plan.

00:17:12.227 --> 00:17:15.467

And when I went to the doctor's office, it wasn't like, let me just hear what

00:17:15.467 --> 00:17:17.547

you want to say. It's like, no, this is my research.

00:17:17.787 --> 00:17:23.327

What is best for me? And so I really went in there and I learned how to advocate for myself.

00:17:23.447 --> 00:17:26.867

And I'm teaching other cancer patients as well. It's like, you know,

00:17:26.907 --> 00:17:28.367

your body better than anybody.

00:17:28.647 --> 00:17:33.307

So it's up to you to do the research and advocate for yourself because there

00:17:33.307 --> 00:17:37.627

were certain times, For example, when I was having chemo, the pre-meds were

00:17:37.627 --> 00:17:42.127

too much. They were giving me the same medication as someone that was probably twice my size.

00:17:42.307 --> 00:17:46.647

And so since I did my research, I was able to say, can we bring it down a little bit?

00:17:46.787 --> 00:17:50.767

And because of that, the side effects dwindled severely.

00:17:52.387 --> 00:17:55.507

Wow. Wow, wow, wow. Yeah, that's incredible.

00:17:56.167 --> 00:18:01.647

My gosh. The way that you approach this whole thing with your research is just

00:18:01.647 --> 00:18:04.707

that's that's literally amazing.

00:18:05.227 --> 00:18:08.547

Wow. Wow. Thank you so very much. Thank you so much.

00:18:08.647 --> 00:18:12.807

And to answer the second part of your question in terms of some of the moments

00:18:12.807 --> 00:18:14.807

that may not have been as high.

00:18:15.087 --> 00:18:20.567

I remember, you know, as a female, oftentimes we identify ourselves based on

00:18:20.567 --> 00:18:22.307

our hair and our boobs. loops.

00:18:22.367 --> 00:18:26.627

And once you lose both of those, it really causes you to really,

00:18:26.647 --> 00:18:30.247

really search deep down inside to figure out who am I at the core?

00:18:30.427 --> 00:18:33.607

You know, you lose your hair, you lose your eyebrows, you lose your eyelashes.

00:18:33.987 --> 00:18:39.167

And it's like, wow, well, who is Tandi? Who is Tandi behind all of that?

00:18:39.407 --> 00:18:46.407

And it really caused me to sit a lot and journal a lot and create a lot so that

00:18:46.407 --> 00:18:50.867

I could express myself because cancer is not just a physical journey.

00:18:50.947 --> 00:18:55.367

It is a mental journey. It is a financial journey, is a spiritual journey.

00:18:55.507 --> 00:18:57.447

And so I'm like, how do I navigate this?

00:18:57.607 --> 00:19:02.247

And so I learned the art of yoga and meditation and journaling so that I could

00:19:02.247 --> 00:19:06.467

release those emotions because the emotions will come, you know, they will come and go.

00:19:06.627 --> 00:19:11.547

And so like, how do I release these emotions in a healthy way so that they're

00:19:11.547 --> 00:19:13.207

not all bottled inside? Right.

00:19:13.787 --> 00:19:19.447

Yeah, absolutely. Your faith. Talk to me about your faith journey.

00:19:20.027 --> 00:19:25.447

For myself, my faith, my family, I say you're the only way I got through my

00:19:25.447 --> 00:19:27.227

own, you know, life changing experience.

00:19:27.587 --> 00:19:31.287

And I hear you talk a lot about your faith, a lot about your family.

00:19:31.427 --> 00:19:37.947

And I would love to hear your faith journey and the impact it had on this whole experience.

00:19:38.607 --> 00:19:43.967

Absolutely. And Kevin, when I first heard about the diagnosis, I was so angry.

00:19:44.267 --> 00:19:48.687

I mean, just really, really angry. I'm like, God, why would you allow this to happen to me?

00:19:48.827 --> 00:19:54.487

Like I said, I ate healthy. I worked out. I checked every box I thought to stay cancer free.

00:19:54.687 --> 00:19:59.647

And so I was so angry. And I remember like it was yesterday after I found out

00:19:59.647 --> 00:20:04.987

that I had to have the chemo and radiation, I came home and I slept for 21 hours

00:20:04.987 --> 00:20:09.227

because I felt like I was literally dead to the world. I had nothing else to give.

00:20:09.467 --> 00:20:14.647

And Kevin, I turned off my phone. And in that time, those 21 hours,

00:20:14.847 --> 00:20:19.487

again, I went to bed angry, but there was something in my spirit,

00:20:19.587 --> 00:20:21.847

Kevin, that said, you will fight and win.

00:20:22.067 --> 00:20:26.427

And I knew from that moment that that was my faith. That was God really speaking

00:20:26.427 --> 00:20:29.607

to me, letting me know that, Tondi, this is not the end.

00:20:29.767 --> 00:20:32.487

This is not the end. As a matter of fact, it's just the beginning.

00:20:32.747 --> 00:20:38.067

And when I was in bed for 21 hours, I literally saw saw a bow and arrow, right?

00:20:38.147 --> 00:20:41.927

And so if you think about the bow and arrow, the further back you pull a bow

00:20:41.927 --> 00:20:45.467

and arrow, when you let it go, the further the trajectory.

00:20:45.887 --> 00:20:50.167

And so I felt like I was saying just for a small moment, a small portion of

00:20:50.167 --> 00:20:52.587

your life, I'm going to pull you back just a little bit.

00:20:52.647 --> 00:20:57.347

But once you're done with this, once I let it go, the impact that you are going

00:20:57.347 --> 00:21:01.287

to make on this world is going to be like amazing.

00:21:02.767 --> 00:21:06.527

And so I held onto that, Kevin. So I prayed a lot. I said, God,

00:21:06.827 --> 00:21:10.267

I need wisdom. Give me wisdom to get through this.

00:21:10.467 --> 00:21:15.287

Give me a strategy to get through this. Give me the faith that I need to get through this.

00:21:15.347 --> 00:21:19.667

And yes, there were some dark days, but I will say, Kevin, that throughout the

00:21:19.667 --> 00:21:23.287

journey, I know that God was with me every step of the way.

00:21:23.367 --> 00:21:28.107

I mean, hands down, there's no way that I could have gotten through it if it

00:21:28.107 --> 00:21:32.567

wasn't for my faith and my belief in God. Yeah. Oh, my gosh.

00:21:32.787 --> 00:21:38.227

And what a beautiful visualization of the Bellinero.

00:21:38.727 --> 00:21:46.007

Wow. I mean, that is that is such a beautiful way to look at what you are going through. Hmm.

00:21:47.168 --> 00:21:54.128

Thank you. Yeah, that's amazing. What other groups I was curious about,

00:21:54.288 --> 00:21:59.888

were there any support groups or or certain friends or anything that you found

00:21:59.888 --> 00:22:01.108

yourself really leaning on?

00:22:01.808 --> 00:22:06.428

Absolutely. As I mentioned, like this is a journey that you cannot walk by yourself.

00:22:06.728 --> 00:22:11.848

And so I learned how to be very transparent. I learned that in this season,

00:22:11.968 --> 00:22:15.668

like I'm used to being the strong one, Kevin. I'm used to everyone relying on

00:22:15.668 --> 00:22:17.448

me and saying, Tanya, I need this. I need that.

00:22:17.648 --> 00:22:23.728

But in this season, I allow myself to be vulnerable and really say when I needed help.

00:22:23.908 --> 00:22:29.028

And so my friends from college, my friends in the area, they really rallied around.

00:22:29.368 --> 00:22:33.108

We literally, before my first surgery, 30 days leading up to it,

00:22:33.188 --> 00:22:36.468

we were on calls every day. They would give me inspiration.

00:22:36.748 --> 00:22:41.348

They would pray with me. And it was just an incredible moment to have my family

00:22:41.348 --> 00:22:44.988

and my friends and my co-workers be of support.

00:22:45.188 --> 00:22:49.388

So they would send care packages. They would come. They created a meal train.

00:22:49.688 --> 00:22:55.388

They just did so much to help me through this, to help lift my head up day after day.

00:22:55.848 --> 00:23:02.268

Oh, my goodness. We think sometimes it seems like we default to the idea at

00:23:02.268 --> 00:23:03.968

times in our lives that we,

00:23:04.461 --> 00:23:08.281

It's our burden to carry and we don't want to put it on anybody else.

00:23:08.801 --> 00:23:12.981

And the truth is, is we're meant to do this life together.

00:23:13.461 --> 00:23:21.301

Yes. You know, and so I am so happy to hear that you were able to find support in others.

00:23:21.861 --> 00:23:29.361

Thank you so much. Yeah, absolutely. So talk to me about when this starts to

00:23:29.361 --> 00:23:32.981

wrap up all this treatment and you're coming to the end.

00:23:32.981 --> 00:23:39.981

And was it like, I'm kind of wondering, like, at the end, did you get that amazing news?

00:23:40.401 --> 00:23:44.061

You know, talk to me about that doctor's appointment. Yeah, absolutely.

00:23:44.321 --> 00:23:47.701

So after my last surgery, you know, I was counting down like,

00:23:47.781 --> 00:23:54.641

yes, the last surgery and really excited about, you know, the progress that was being made.

00:23:54.881 --> 00:23:59.061

And then when I went in for my follow up and they told me that the cancer was

00:23:59.061 --> 00:24:03.081

in remission, that was like music to my ears. I was so excited.

00:24:03.241 --> 00:24:07.701

And what some people fail to realize is, you know, even after the surgery is

00:24:07.701 --> 00:24:13.241

over, even after the radiation, the chemo, there is like a post treatment journey

00:24:13.241 --> 00:24:14.781

that I didn't know about.

00:24:14.921 --> 00:24:19.441

And so I finished my quote unquote, my treatment, thinking that I would go into

00:24:19.441 --> 00:24:23.221

this blissful state that, oh, everything was going to be peaches and cream.

00:24:23.401 --> 00:24:29.221

No, Kevin, there is a side of the journey that happens after treatment.

00:24:29.221 --> 00:24:31.521

You start to worry about a recurrence.

00:24:31.541 --> 00:24:35.221

You have to do maintenance checkups. You know, so there are so many things that

00:24:35.221 --> 00:24:37.341

I didn't know about that happened.

00:24:37.401 --> 00:24:41.481

But yes, it was a breath of fresh air because I wasn't going in and out of the

00:24:41.481 --> 00:24:43.701

doctor every week or every other day.

00:24:43.781 --> 00:24:45.981

So I have more time to create.

00:24:46.161 --> 00:24:49.261

I have more time to think. I have more time to reflect.

00:24:49.581 --> 00:24:54.401

I have more time to see my therapist and really figure out, okay, what happens next?

00:24:54.601 --> 00:24:58.261

How do I create or how do I build this Tandi 2.0?

00:24:58.835 --> 00:25:04.975

Yeah, absolutely. How long did it take you to really get over?

00:25:05.095 --> 00:25:08.775

Because I would imagine, and I would imagine maybe even still today,

00:25:08.895 --> 00:25:10.495

I mean, goodness, it's not been that long.

00:25:11.175 --> 00:25:15.075

Is there still that fear of what if it comes back?

00:25:15.735 --> 00:25:21.815

Absolutely. Every week, Kevin. So something I may see, something that reminded me of my journey.

00:25:21.855 --> 00:25:26.115

I may hear a song or I may do a certain recipe that I did when I was going through

00:25:26.115 --> 00:25:29.115

my journey and it will trigger something in me.

00:25:29.235 --> 00:25:33.595

And so trauma, when you think about trauma, it's ongoing, it's recurring.

00:25:33.855 --> 00:25:38.615

And so to help me heal, Kevin, and I'm continuing to heal every single day,

00:25:38.775 --> 00:25:42.795

I really pour my work into breast cancer advocacy.

00:25:42.795 --> 00:25:47.715

I really pour my work into and my time into helping others, you know,

00:25:47.715 --> 00:25:51.795

that have gone through trauma, whether it's a loss or a diagnosis or abuse.

00:25:52.115 --> 00:25:54.995

How do you turn that trauma into creativity?

00:25:55.415 --> 00:25:59.375

And so I've created courses and I just finished a course, an eight week course.

00:25:59.535 --> 00:26:03.155

And it has been amazing to help others who have come behind me.

00:26:03.375 --> 00:26:05.575

How do you create creativity?

00:26:05.855 --> 00:26:08.575

Like whether it's a documentary, whether it's a one woman show,

00:26:08.815 --> 00:26:13.435

whatever it may be. So a part of my healing is to really give back to the community

00:26:13.435 --> 00:26:17.955

through breast cancer advocacy work, through, you know, health and wellness

00:26:17.955 --> 00:26:20.215

workshops, through motivational speaking.

00:26:20.395 --> 00:26:25.895

So everything that I do now, it's literally centered around cancer as well as

00:26:25.895 --> 00:26:27.595

overall health and wellness for women.

00:26:27.855 --> 00:26:30.615

Yeah, that is absolutely incredible.

00:26:31.875 --> 00:26:38.835

You mentioned before all of this happened that you felt like you were missing

00:26:38.835 --> 00:26:40.535

something. your life's purpose.

00:26:41.195 --> 00:26:44.975

Through all of this, do you feel like you found that purpose?

00:26:45.355 --> 00:26:47.895

Without a shadow of a doubt, 100%.

00:26:49.495 --> 00:26:53.835

Okay. Talk to me about how you knew when you found your purpose and exactly

00:26:53.835 --> 00:26:56.375

what you came to identify your purpose as.

00:26:56.915 --> 00:27:01.355

Absolutely. I would say throughout the journey, I journaled a lot and trying

00:27:01.355 --> 00:27:04.555

to figure out what is this all about? What is this all about?

00:27:04.815 --> 00:27:08.035

And what I wrote in my journal is this is not punishment.

00:27:08.415 --> 00:27:10.255

This is a realignment.

00:27:11.795 --> 00:27:14.815

That's what I wrote down in my journal. And I'm like, okay, what does that mean?

00:27:15.075 --> 00:27:18.655

And I just looked at the word realignment, you know, to put in position.

00:27:18.995 --> 00:27:20.395

And so I was like, okay, well, what is,

00:27:21.071 --> 00:27:25.951

tell me more. So I started writing more. And so I realized that through this,

00:27:26.771 --> 00:27:32.111

the mask that I talked about earlier with Tandi 1.0, I was able to remove the mask.

00:27:32.271 --> 00:27:36.311

I was able to remove all of the superficial things that quote unquote made me a woman.

00:27:36.471 --> 00:27:40.971

And I really dig down deep inside to figure out, okay, Tandi,

00:27:41.091 --> 00:27:49.671

your purpose in life is to help women shift from existing to living because Tondi 1.0 was existing.

00:27:49.871 --> 00:27:55.351

You know, now after this diagnosis, I feel as though I am living my best life.

00:27:55.851 --> 00:27:59.591

Yes. Yes. Wow. So powerful.

00:28:00.411 --> 00:28:06.451

You know, you, you're like the epitome of the whole thing of like post-traumatic growth.

00:28:06.671 --> 00:28:14.431

Yes. Of growing on the other side of trauma. Yes. That is Tondi 2.0 on the way.

00:28:16.511 --> 00:28:25.631

My goodness. Yeah. Talk to me about the growth even of your family, of your children,

00:28:25.871 --> 00:28:30.991

because I can imagine they probably grew in that year more than you probably

00:28:30.991 --> 00:28:31.851

ever could have imagined.

00:28:32.491 --> 00:28:36.691

Absolutely. And even at a young age, they were eight and four at the time,

00:28:36.771 --> 00:28:41.751

now they're older, but their faith has increased because I mentioned we had

00:28:41.751 --> 00:28:45.491

prayer calls and calls leading up to the surgery, sometimes,

00:28:45.571 --> 00:28:47.211

Kevin, they would pray on the call.

00:28:47.431 --> 00:28:51.671

Sometimes they would really provide that inspiration for the day.

00:28:51.831 --> 00:28:53.811

And so their faith has increased.

00:28:54.191 --> 00:28:57.751

Their maturity has increased because mommy couldn't do it all.

00:28:57.931 --> 00:29:02.311

I couldn't cook every day. I couldn't wash all the clothes every day.

00:29:02.351 --> 00:29:06.191

So they had to learn how to do some of that themselves, which again,

00:29:06.231 --> 00:29:11.151

helped them to be more responsible and really dig down deep inside and say,

00:29:11.211 --> 00:29:12.791

you know what? I can do this.

00:29:12.851 --> 00:29:16.591

I can help out around the house. And so they have grown tremendously.

00:29:17.151 --> 00:29:21.111

My husband as well. You know, we've been married. It'll be this year for 17

00:29:21.111 --> 00:29:24.831

years. And we have such an appreciation even more now.

00:29:25.788 --> 00:29:30.028

For each other than we did before the diagnosis. And I would say for my immediate

00:29:30.028 --> 00:29:33.008

family, it's interesting, interesting story.

00:29:33.148 --> 00:29:35.388

My mom and my dad, they are divorced.

00:29:35.628 --> 00:29:40.908

And so it has been probably 20 plus years since we have spent the holiday together.

00:29:41.248 --> 00:29:46.408

So Kevin, the year of my diagnosis, 2021, we spent Christmas together.

00:29:47.768 --> 00:29:55.388

My entire family. So my stepmom, my dad, my mom, We spent Christmas together

00:29:55.388 --> 00:29:57.748

for the first time in probably 20 plus years.

00:29:58.028 --> 00:30:03.288

And so when I say that, this diagnosis not only changed my life,

00:30:03.408 --> 00:30:06.308

but it has brought my family closer together.

00:30:06.908 --> 00:30:08.768

Yeah. Oh, my goodness.

00:30:09.488 --> 00:30:11.048

It's so powerful.

00:30:11.968 --> 00:30:17.268

And talking about powerful, I want you to expand on something that I heard in

00:30:17.268 --> 00:30:19.648

one of your videos I was watching on YouTube.

00:30:20.608 --> 00:30:26.388

And when I was watching it, I couldn't help it, but trying to not cry myself because,

00:30:26.848 --> 00:30:33.788

you were crying when you were trying to let the words come out that you felt

00:30:33.788 --> 00:30:35.808

like all of this was worth it in the end.

00:30:37.108 --> 00:30:40.548

Would you, would you talk to me about that? Oh my goodness.

00:30:40.608 --> 00:30:46.548

Those words, it kind of triggers something as well. So it's like, oh my God, yes, I can.

00:30:46.848 --> 00:30:50.348

But just thinking Thinking about it, to your point, it just almost brings me

00:30:50.348 --> 00:30:54.308

to tears as well, because oftentimes when we go through a journey,

00:30:54.388 --> 00:30:57.168

when we go through something, you know, when I was at the very beginning,

00:30:57.388 --> 00:30:59.808

I could not see my way out.

00:30:59.868 --> 00:31:04.848

I could not understand the why, you know, and so I stopped asking myself why.

00:31:05.148 --> 00:31:07.688

And I started asking myself, what now?

00:31:09.068 --> 00:31:12.508

Since it happened to me, what now? What do I need to do as a result?

00:31:12.768 --> 00:31:18.108

And so when I say it was worth it, would I want to go through it again? Absolutely. not.

00:31:18.508 --> 00:31:23.108

No way. But the 12 months of the journey that I went through,

00:31:23.208 --> 00:31:28.568

it was worth it because as I mentioned, I found out who I was at the core.

00:31:28.728 --> 00:31:31.948

I found out how do I value and appreciate life.

00:31:32.128 --> 00:31:37.208

And I learned so much. There were so many lessons. I learned probably over 81 lessons, Kevin.

00:31:37.368 --> 00:31:41.248

And one of the biggest lessons that I learned was life is all about perspective.

00:31:41.648 --> 00:31:44.588

Your situation changes when your mindset changes.

00:31:45.648 --> 00:31:49.468

And that's what shifted during those 21 hours that I talked about when I was

00:31:49.468 --> 00:31:53.668

in the bed, sleeping dead to the world, I began to change my mindset.

00:31:53.788 --> 00:31:58.268

And when I heard the words, you will fight and win that changed my mindset and

00:31:58.268 --> 00:31:59.368

that changed my perspective.

00:32:00.008 --> 00:32:06.968

Wow. You are a warrior, aren't you? Yes, absolutely. Yes. Oh my goodness.

00:32:07.648 --> 00:32:12.928

Wow. So there's something that's kind of fun that I want to talk about.

00:32:12.928 --> 00:32:17.408

And I got a few more questions after this one, but I think it's just time to

00:32:17.408 --> 00:32:24.048

get it out there is I am a long time, pretty much lifelong Pittsburgh Steelers fan.

00:32:24.348 --> 00:32:31.048

OK, so I don't really understand why I want to talk about the Dallas Cowboys. Oh, my goodness.

00:32:33.148 --> 00:32:39.768

But I heard a story about you and the Cowboys that I would love for you to share.

00:32:40.788 --> 00:32:44.668

Yes. So we were friends at first, Kevin, before you said that.

00:32:45.888 --> 00:32:48.808

I may have to pull that friendship title back.

00:32:51.788 --> 00:32:57.208

Oh, wow. Too funny. So I've been a Dallas Cowboy fan for like probably all of

00:32:57.208 --> 00:33:00.108

my life and I enjoyed the Dallas Cowboys.

00:33:00.288 --> 00:33:04.808

They are near and dear to my heart. You know, it's sometimes I have to take

00:33:04.808 --> 00:33:08.588

my magnesium to calm my nerves before a game because you just never know,

00:33:08.628 --> 00:33:12.128

Kevin, you know, they'll be up and then they will just come back down.

00:33:12.288 --> 00:33:13.648

So I keep my magnesium handy.

00:33:14.788 --> 00:33:20.248

But last year, because of the advocacy work that I've been doing in the community,

00:33:20.428 --> 00:33:22.828

I was selected by Susan G.

00:33:22.868 --> 00:33:27.148

Coleman, as well as the Dallas Cowboys to be one of the five,

00:33:27.787 --> 00:33:31.967

star survivors. And it was such an incredible moment.

00:33:32.087 --> 00:33:33.407

When I received the phone call,

00:33:33.607 --> 00:33:37.287

I thought I was being pumped by Ashton Kutcher. I was like, no, no way.

00:33:38.747 --> 00:33:43.927

Who did? No, seriously? And because it was over a hundred applicants.

00:33:44.227 --> 00:33:50.007

And so to be chosen as one of the five was, it was an incredible moment that

00:33:50.007 --> 00:33:51.547

I will never, ever, ever forget.

00:33:51.927 --> 00:33:55.947

And so throughout Throughout that time, they gave us a three-day experience.

00:33:56.367 --> 00:34:00.387

And so day one, we were able to go to the stadium. We were able to stand in

00:34:00.387 --> 00:34:01.667

front of the practice field.

00:34:01.807 --> 00:34:05.487

And so when the players went by, they were able to hug us. So when I hugged

00:34:05.487 --> 00:34:07.507

Dak Prescott, I almost fainted, Kevin.

00:34:11.127 --> 00:34:17.067

And so it was amazing to see Dak and CD and all of the other players live and in person.

00:34:17.207 --> 00:34:19.927

And so they do this every year. So they've done it for, I think,

00:34:19.927 --> 00:34:26.007

the past maybe five or six years. And so to be selected as a 2023 cohort was

00:34:26.007 --> 00:34:27.927

indeed an amazing experience.

00:34:28.147 --> 00:34:30.827

And then we had like a little shopping spree, a pampering day.

00:34:31.027 --> 00:34:33.947

And then on that Sunday, we were honored on the field.

00:34:34.107 --> 00:34:37.647

So we were able to go to a home game, honored on the field. And then we had

00:34:37.647 --> 00:34:39.967

some like box seats up at the top.

00:34:40.547 --> 00:34:43.667

Wow. Wow. That is so amazing.

00:34:44.607 --> 00:34:52.047

Thank you. Thank you so much. Oh, my goodness, man. Man, that is America's team.

00:34:52.127 --> 00:34:53.827

Let's just face it. It is, it is.

00:34:55.487 --> 00:35:01.587

Oh my goodness. That is, I heard that story and I was like, oh my goodness, we got to talk about it.

00:35:01.747 --> 00:35:05.967

Wow, thank you. Thank you so much. Of course, of course.

00:35:06.687 --> 00:35:10.887

Talk to me a little bit about life today. It's been a little bit.

00:35:11.087 --> 00:35:16.327

I'm curious how it's impacted your day-to-day life with what you're doing now.

00:35:16.327 --> 00:35:21.047

Now, we've talked a lot about your mindset on life, but I'm just kind of curious,

00:35:21.127 --> 00:35:26.787

this Tondi 2.0 who's going through life, what does her life look like?

00:35:27.490 --> 00:35:30.330

That's a big question. How much time do you have? I'm just kidding.

00:35:32.850 --> 00:35:37.670

I will keep it short. But I will say that, Kevin, after I had my last surgery,

00:35:37.910 --> 00:35:39.810

I decided to go back to work.

00:35:39.870 --> 00:35:45.230

So still a marketing executive. So I went back to work and it was a struggle

00:35:45.230 --> 00:35:48.930

for me because the things that were once important, like revenue,

00:35:49.070 --> 00:35:52.830

bottom line, client, you know, appreciation, all that stuff.

00:35:52.970 --> 00:35:55.610

It was really important before the diagnosis.

00:35:55.810 --> 00:36:00.290

And then when I came back, I'm like, you know, I'm in these back to back meetings.

00:36:00.370 --> 00:36:02.710

We're talking about revenue and profitability.

00:36:03.310 --> 00:36:07.870

I don't really care about this anymore. You know, it's not important to me.

00:36:07.870 --> 00:36:11.230

And the clients that we're working on, it's like, yes, it's still good work,

00:36:11.290 --> 00:36:16.550

but this is, I didn't survive to stay alive to go back to this.

00:36:16.970 --> 00:36:20.650

As much as I was grateful for it, it was just something that was missing.

00:36:20.690 --> 00:36:22.750

And so I stayed for five months, Kevin.

00:36:23.150 --> 00:36:28.430

And then I've always been on the entrepreneurial path, you know, but this expedited it.

00:36:28.770 --> 00:36:32.390

So I've always, it's not like I just snapped my finger one day and decided to leave.

00:36:32.450 --> 00:36:35.970

No, I had already been working on the plan even before the diagnosis.

00:36:35.970 --> 00:36:37.910

Like, Tondi, what is your exit strategy?

00:36:38.230 --> 00:36:43.090

What are your goals for the next five to 10 years? And so on that plan,

00:36:43.410 --> 00:36:46.210

I've always wanted to go the entrepreneurial route.

00:36:46.410 --> 00:36:52.450

And so Kevin, after five months, I was like, you know, I think I've had enough. I've had enough.

00:36:52.630 --> 00:36:56.270

And so even during my diagnosis, I was working on my business plan.

00:36:56.490 --> 00:37:01.950

I had my website. I started working on things slowly because I knew that somewhere

00:37:01.950 --> 00:37:07.930

along the way, I would have to say say goodbye to the agency world and start my own thing.

00:37:08.190 --> 00:37:12.270

And so May 31st of last year was my last day in corporate.

00:37:13.210 --> 00:37:19.210

I said goodbye. Yes, I said goodbye. And it was very scary because I had been

00:37:19.210 --> 00:37:21.110

doing that for 15 years, very comfortable.

00:37:21.910 --> 00:37:25.750

I knew the paycheck was coming, so it was really great.

00:37:25.890 --> 00:37:29.690

But when I took a step of faith and said, you know, it's time.

00:37:29.690 --> 00:37:35.570

And it wasn't just me, you know, just razzle dazzle. No, I had a plan in place.

00:37:35.870 --> 00:37:41.470

And so I began to reach out to a few of my former clients and people in my network

00:37:41.470 --> 00:37:44.610

for my doctors or whatever. And I told them that I'm leaving.

00:37:44.830 --> 00:37:48.510

I said, but I'll be more than happy to consult to do, you know,

00:37:48.510 --> 00:37:49.910

health and wellness or marketing.

00:37:50.190 --> 00:37:54.330

If you need help, just let me know. And I reached out to so many breast cancer

00:37:54.330 --> 00:37:58.030

advocacy groups to let them know what I was doing. And before you know it,

00:37:58.050 --> 00:37:59.470

Kevin, I got my first client.

00:38:00.570 --> 00:38:04.250

Woo-hoo! I got my first client last year.

00:38:04.350 --> 00:38:07.150

And, you know, one client turned into two, two turned into three.

00:38:07.370 --> 00:38:09.270

And it's just, you know, continuing to grow.

00:38:09.981 --> 00:38:14.701

The Tandi Monet brand. And so as I mentioned earlier, my purpose in life is

00:38:14.701 --> 00:38:17.181

to help women shift from existing to living.

00:38:17.341 --> 00:38:22.261

And that is the mission of the Tandi Monet brand is to help women all around

00:38:22.261 --> 00:38:24.641

the world shift from existing to living.

00:38:24.741 --> 00:38:28.001

And so that's what I do full time, whether it's health and wellness,

00:38:28.181 --> 00:38:30.901

whether it's marketing, whether it's breast cancer advocacy,

00:38:31.261 --> 00:38:35.121

whether it's working with moms to show them that, hey, even though you're a

00:38:35.121 --> 00:38:38.181

mom, you're not just a mom. You're more than a mom.

00:38:38.321 --> 00:38:43.081

And so how do you still find your life's purpose, even as you're being pulled

00:38:43.081 --> 00:38:44.821

a hundred thousand different ways.

00:38:45.021 --> 00:38:50.501

And so through consulting and courses and just really helping those who have,

00:38:50.581 --> 00:38:54.681

are going through what I've gone through, that's what I do on a day-to-day basis.

00:38:54.921 --> 00:38:57.061

And it's fulfilling work. It's impactful.

00:38:57.421 --> 00:39:01.781

It's a lot of work, but at the end of the day, I can, I can rest knowing that

00:39:01.781 --> 00:39:08.601

today I did something that will help someone shift from existing to living. Yeah. Wow.

00:39:09.421 --> 00:39:16.321

You know, when, when you talk about becoming this almost a new version of yourself and,

00:39:16.521 --> 00:39:22.201

and I feel like anybody listening who's been through something dramatic in your,

00:39:22.221 --> 00:39:25.801

in your life, one of these life shattering moments, like I referred to them,

00:39:25.841 --> 00:39:30.601

the fact is true is on the other side, we're, we're changed.

00:39:31.221 --> 00:39:34.421

We, we become a new version of ourselves.

00:39:34.601 --> 00:39:42.541

And, and so to hear you talking about going back to that career and realizing,

00:39:42.801 --> 00:39:44.641

you know, stuff, it doesn't matter.

00:39:44.761 --> 00:39:51.141

It's not important to me because you just literally realized how limited our

00:39:51.141 --> 00:39:56.981

time here is on earth and how fragile every single day is. Yeah.

00:39:57.766 --> 00:40:02.086

And so I just thought that was such a powerful, you know, realization.

00:40:02.166 --> 00:40:08.726

I applaud you for realizing that it is okay.

00:40:08.846 --> 00:40:10.966

I have become somebody new.

00:40:11.086 --> 00:40:15.106

And so therefore, it's perfectly good for me to pursue it.

00:40:15.486 --> 00:40:18.526

Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely.

00:40:19.346 --> 00:40:24.726

Yes. Yes. Well, amazing. Well, listen, I have one last question for you.

00:40:24.726 --> 00:40:29.386

But before I ask you that question, would you please share with with anybody

00:40:29.386 --> 00:40:34.026

listening the best place to get connected in your world? Where can we send them?

00:40:34.386 --> 00:40:38.166

Yes, absolutely. So you can go online to my website.

00:40:38.506 --> 00:40:47.606

It's www.tandimone.com. And Tandi is spelled T-H-A-N-D-I.

00:40:47.986 --> 00:40:55.806

Monet is spelled M-O-N-E-E. You can also find me on Instagram and TikTok at Tondi Monet.

00:40:56.346 --> 00:41:00.646

Yeah. Okay. I will be sure that all of that is in the show notes.

00:41:00.726 --> 00:41:05.686

And just to mention, you do have a pretty cool resource that I found on your

00:41:05.686 --> 00:41:10.626

website that goes back to the affirmations, right? Yes, absolutely.

00:41:10.906 --> 00:41:17.766

Yes. So it's called 15 Positive Affirmations to Reignite Passion and Purpose.

00:41:17.766 --> 00:41:21.766

And so, as I mentioned before, Kevin, like this is, this is my life now.

00:41:21.906 --> 00:41:27.946

This is my life now. And so what I did was put together this really simple PDF

00:41:27.946 --> 00:41:31.406

and it's an ebook that people can download for free on the website.

00:41:31.566 --> 00:41:37.306

And it talks about, you know, clarity and it talks about your progress and how

00:41:37.306 --> 00:41:42.106

you're worthy and just certain things that you can do to reignite your purpose.

00:41:42.106 --> 00:41:45.786

So for those who may feel as though they are just, you know,

00:41:45.806 --> 00:41:50.446

checking the box or they're on the hamster wheel of life, this ebook will really

00:41:50.446 --> 00:41:52.966

help you kind of pause and say, you know what?

00:41:53.859 --> 00:41:57.799

There's more to life than what I'm experiencing right now. There's more to me

00:41:57.799 --> 00:41:59.319

than what I'm experiencing right now.

00:41:59.499 --> 00:42:04.019

And so I want to reignite the passion that I once had, you know, when we were kids.

00:42:04.159 --> 00:42:08.139

I reignite the passion that I once had when life wasn't so hard.

00:42:08.339 --> 00:42:13.499

And so my hope is that as people begin to comb through the pages of this e-book,

00:42:13.559 --> 00:42:19.559

that they will begin to feel and reignite the passion that was once dormant inside of them.

00:42:19.879 --> 00:42:22.039

Yeah, that is incredible.

00:42:22.459 --> 00:42:28.899

Woohoo! Yeah. No, I mean, I just, I just, I love your spirit.

00:42:28.979 --> 00:42:34.079

I love who you are and the way that you, you just view life.

00:42:34.399 --> 00:42:40.119

And I think it's really just like a breath of fresh air to speak with somebody

00:42:40.119 --> 00:42:45.519

like you, who, I mean, you just, you literally can see your smile simply through your voice.

00:42:46.059 --> 00:42:50.299

And, and yet you've been through all that you've gone through.

00:42:50.299 --> 00:42:54.659

And yet look at who you are and where you are today.

00:42:55.539 --> 00:42:59.679

Wow. Thank you so much. Of course, of course.

00:42:59.779 --> 00:43:08.019

My last question for you is for the woman listening today who maybe she's a few steps behind you.

00:43:08.339 --> 00:43:10.199

Maybe she just found a lump.

00:43:11.219 --> 00:43:15.919

Maybe she just had that mammogram and is waiting on a call back from the doctor.

00:43:15.919 --> 00:43:22.219

Or maybe she's a little bit further along in the process and she got that devastating news.

00:43:23.019 --> 00:43:26.399

What would you like to say to her right now?

00:43:26.799 --> 00:43:30.079

Well, first I want to reach out and give her a hug. So I hope she can feel the

00:43:30.079 --> 00:43:32.939

hug that I'm giving her because it's a journey.

00:43:33.039 --> 00:43:36.499

And that initial phase is very difficult.

00:43:36.699 --> 00:43:43.399

And I would tell her to give herself permission to feel all of the feelings.

00:43:43.399 --> 00:43:46.419

Feelings don't try to go into this toxic

00:43:46.419 --> 00:43:49.659

positivity and say oh everything is hunky-dory no no

00:43:49.659 --> 00:43:52.619

it's really it's really hard right now and

00:43:52.619 --> 00:43:55.439

give yourself the space and the grace to

00:43:55.439 --> 00:44:00.179

feel those emotions that would be the first step because oftentimes Kevin we

00:44:00.179 --> 00:44:04.539

try to rush through those emotions but if you're feeling angry allow yourself

00:44:04.539 --> 00:44:10.099

to feel angry if you're if you're mad be mad you know so it's okay to feel those

00:44:10.099 --> 00:44:13.839

emotions the second thing that I would say is find a support system.

00:44:14.059 --> 00:44:17.799

So whether it's your family, whether it's a cancer support group,

00:44:17.979 --> 00:44:22.099

whether it's your hospital, they have support groups as well.

00:44:22.319 --> 00:44:27.779

It's very important to find a support group so that you can see someone who

00:44:27.779 --> 00:44:31.839

has already made it through what you've gone through and they can hold your hand.

00:44:31.999 --> 00:44:35.339

It's very, very important to do that. So I would say that's number two.

00:44:35.639 --> 00:44:40.659

And then number three, I would say, what do you want to learn in this situation?

00:44:41.697 --> 00:44:46.297

And whether it's you documenting your experience, whether it's you speaking

00:44:46.297 --> 00:44:49.597

about your experience, there's something in this journey.

00:44:49.977 --> 00:44:53.337

There's a test and there's a lesson in this test for you to learn.

00:44:53.657 --> 00:44:57.997

You didn't do anything wrong. You didn't cause it. So give yourself that grace

00:44:57.997 --> 00:45:05.757

to release the pressure of saying, what did I do to deserve this? You did nothing wrong.

00:45:06.097 --> 00:45:08.357

It's just so happened that it happened

00:45:08.357 --> 00:45:12.417

to you, but there's going to be something on the other side of it.

00:45:12.497 --> 00:45:18.617

And I pray that you will have the energy and the wisdom to, to make it through

00:45:18.617 --> 00:45:22.057

this journey and fight like you've never fought before.

00:45:23.797 --> 00:45:27.697

Such powerful words from one powerful woman.

00:45:28.577 --> 00:45:33.717

Tondi, thank you so much for being here today, for sharing your story and,

00:45:33.737 --> 00:45:40.117

and just making us kind of look at even the hard times in a little bit different light. Yeah.

00:45:40.457 --> 00:45:44.217

Thank you so much, Kevin. And thank you again for creating this platform.

00:45:44.557 --> 00:45:49.737

I wish you nothing but the best as you continue to allow this platform to just

00:45:49.737 --> 00:45:54.437

spread your voice and spread positivity because it is definitely needed in the

00:45:54.437 --> 00:45:57.137

world. Yeah, thank you so much.

00:45:57.377 --> 00:46:04.317

And for you listening today, my hope, my prayer is that this impacted your life.

00:46:04.657 --> 00:46:10.877

And if you have somebody who you feel, wow, they need to hear this story too,

00:46:11.037 --> 00:46:13.057

please go ahead and share it with them.

00:46:13.637 --> 00:46:17.537

The best thing that we can do for anybody is to reach out. So whether it's a

00:46:17.537 --> 00:46:20.017

friend you haven't talked to in a while, but you know they're going through

00:46:20.017 --> 00:46:26.217

some stuff, or whether it's somebody you know very well, your sister, your mom, a cousin,

00:46:26.957 --> 00:46:29.057

a woman who's experiencing this.

00:46:29.857 --> 00:46:35.117

Same thing that Tondi has gone through, send them this episode and let them

00:46:35.117 --> 00:46:38.177

experience the love that this woman has to share.

00:46:38.657 --> 00:46:42.597

And remember this, we can't control what happens in this life.

00:46:43.057 --> 00:46:49.297

But we can control how we react to it. And for Tondi today, she couldn't control

00:46:49.297 --> 00:46:54.357

what happened to her, but she sure could control how she reacted to it.

00:46:54.477 --> 00:47:00.117

And I think you and me can agree that the way she reacted is absolutely remarkable.

00:47:00.717 --> 00:47:05.377

Until next time, I'm Kevin Lowe, and this is Great Grace and Inspiration.

00:47:05.840 --> 00:47:24.463